Thursday, July 29, 2010

The Good Man Project - More Than Eye Candy

On Vacation in Puerto Rico
My friends know of him, they ask me to tell certain salacious stories on occasion, because you know, well, I can spin a pretty good tale. And with this kind of material to work with, it's not too difficult to spin. However, what my friends don't know is the bond that exists between us to this day. We sometimes joke that we will find ourselves available at some ripe old age and finally be able to walk off into the sunset together. Not a bad way to go.

He is a friend who will never desert me. He was there at the end of my marriage and the first call I made when my heart was broken by Chris.  He was there to pick me up and hold me at the St. Louis airport when I returned from burying my mother and  he is there to this day to listen to my tears and confusion when I tell him of my current state of sad affairs. 

First trip to Washington, DC
I first met him at a conference in Chicago, summer of  2004. He had been sitting behind me, watching me, but I had not yet seen him.  When it came time to give our group presentations, he and I were both selected as presenters. He came to the podium, confessing his table had nothing to offer. Their  idea had been stolen by the group just before theirs. With that said, he gave it anyway, entirely in Spanish. I literally swooned at the sight of his deep brown eyes, full lips and dimples that could have been chiseled my Michelangelo himself.

As the conference attendees gathered for dinner later that night, I mentioned to my girlfriend, I was happy to see him on the other side of the room, with four or five much younger, much hotter ladies, all vying for his attention. Because, if he were any closer, he could spell trouble for me. Then almost as if I had willed it to happen, he excused himself from his fan club and made his way to my corner of the room. He knelt behind my friend and I and announced his intentions. "Where are you ladies going after dinner"  he said "because I don't want you to leave without me." 

Christmas in Chicago.
Of course, I thought he was attracted to my petite blond friend with the sparking blue eyes, perfect smile and fit, runner's body. I was sure it was not me in his cupid's cross hairs. But as we made our way from the restaurant, he came up behind me, letting me know, he was not about to leave me unescorted in this big city.

True to his word, he kept a close eye on me, in typical Chicago style, until four in the morning. We stayed with the large group from the conference and soaked up all the city had to offer.  At one point, he lost me to a long line in the ladies room.  I had finally made my way to a stall when I heard a voice from the door beckoning with the sexiest of accents, "Anhela, Anhela, are you here?"

Nothing of a sexual nature transpired between us at that night. I was flattered, enchanted, damn near out of my mind but I held to my beliefs and he to his. A perfect gentleman. The next day, class ended at noon and we were to go our separate ways. He escorted my friend and I to the hotel parking garage and pulled me aside as we waited for the valet to retrieve our car.

Mardi Gras in St. Louis, riding in a limo.
His St. Louis crowd was waiting for him, they had a flight to catch, but he wanted to hug me, say goodbye and wish me well.  Why me, I asked him? I have to know, why did you hang out with me when you had your pick of countless beautiful women here? He explained that he had been watching me "own the room" that first day. He could see my spirit and said that I was, in fact, the most beautiful woman in the room. Well, okay then.

I returned home only to wake up the next morning and find another woman's panties in my bed. The day after that,  I called him.

Now, he's a big shot or something!
We began our love affair as I was working my way through my divorce. From Nashville, to DC, to Chicago to Scottsdale, Indianapolis and St. Louis, we made love to each other, taking our time to deliciously taste, smell, see and feel but we also strolled hand in hand, touring museums, going to the movies, sightseeing and spending hours sharing the most intimate details of our lives. We even liked shopping together.

In Scottsdale, he insisted upon buying me a Coach handbag. 

But I don't like expensive purses, I told him. I like to switch them out and a pricey, designer bag would make me feel guilty for tucking it away in the closet when I grew tired of it.

That's nonsense, he said. Pick something out or we're not leaving this store.

I noticed one of the sales girls was wearing a sterling silver Tiffany heart bracelet. So I said fine, I'll take one of those.

It arrived in the mail a few weeks later, with a note simply saying, "forever". 

We were both becoming single parents, both rising stars within our industry and while we were desperately in love with each other; we always knew our love affair was meant for this time and place. We would not be able to move our children. We were allowed to exist in an ethereal dream state where real life could be set aside and pure pleasure could be experienced during a time when we needed it most. We were both broken, needing to heal our souls and mend our wounds.  We were, as they say, good medicine for each other. 

Our last night together, cheesecake, wine, dancing and happy tears.
When I wrote my "Good Man Project" series earlier this year, I did not include him. Mostly because I was in a relationship and I felt it would be disrespectful. But now, more than ever, I want it made known that of all the relationships I've had in my life, this was the only one that ended without hurt. Looking back, I realize it is because we stayed true to who we were, even in the most difficult of times and we remain true to ourselves today. Sexy as hell and loving each other forever.

Oh, I did I mention he's a model? Eye candy for sure. 


  1. Step away from the keyboard and find him now!!!!

  2. No need to find him Missy - he has been with me all along. To this very day.

  3. Gracias, mi amor.

  4. Happy Friday!! Stopping by to say Hi!.

    Thank you for share nice blog,

    my community is

    Have a nice day.

    PS. From Follow Friday 40 and over

  5. I am a new follower I came over from Friday Follow over 40!!! I am a busy girl today trying to stop by all the over 40 blogs :-) have a great weekend!!!
    great post and yes eye candy for sure your a lucky lady!!!

  6. Hello!

    Oh my...I love your blog!!! I am visiting from Follow Friday 40 and Over and is a new follower of your blog through Google Connect.

    Please stop by sometime and visit my blog at

    Shelli :)

  7. Never too old for eye candy!!
    I am now following you through
    Follow Friday 40+!!
    Peggy Gorman

  8. That is one of the most romantic stories I've ever read! I hope some time, some place, the two of you can find your "happily ever after" in each other's arms because clearly you are so good for each other. Here's to the two of you walking off into the sunset arm-in-arm, side-by-side!


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